Admit it, you've missed me. "What's Lee been up to?" I can hear you think it. Each day, you check your Favorites pages (perhaps I am even honored with a Bloglines feed?), and each day for the past several weeks, nothing. Nada. Zip. Rien. Niks.
Let me assure you that my life is uneventful. Au contraire. It's so f*cking eventful that Dad Watson's and Brouwer's pubs have had to hire extra waitstaff just to deal with my increased consumption of brewed essences of malt and hops that I quaff in an effort to alleviate pain in my neck and head that I suffer so that I can literally keep my head up.
In other words, life sucks right now. But let's be positive. Oscar is employed now. full time. And he actually likes his job--which is an awesome bonus. And his commute time between home and work is approximately 30 seconds each way. He is definitely happier and more relaxed right now. Which is great, because it provides a nice balance to my sulking, doom and gloom demeanor.
Where shall I begin.
Sometime in the past month or so, work entered The Dilbert Zone. Thankfully, not with my own immediate circle of colleagues, but with the 15 billion levels of upper management as well as a support group. Did I already write about the mgmt thing? The "I have a suggestion/recommendation but I'm not going to tell you what it is" Pointy Haired Boss scene? Then the support group situation from another project which started off most recently when my morning began by listening to a long winded voice message (so long, in fact, that the caller was kicked off) in which the caller just had to tell me she was so flabbergasted by the stuff that I had sent her that the only conclusion she could come to about why I had sent her what I did was that I "just wasn't thinking very hard". Oh, I saved that message. Oh, yes I did. After a 30 minute phone conversation between us in an effort to figure out just the f*ck I was supposed to do, and another 45 minute conference call between her, me and the Project Engineer to verify what it the f*ck I was supposed to do, I came to the following conclusions:
1. Every standard agreement is unique.
2. There are an infinite number of ways a design office can prepare agreements, and that is fine.
3. Correction...infinity minus one, because everything that I was doing was wrong.
Here's an example of what I am dealing with:
Support group, via email: Lee, send me an email requesting the official request form.
Me, via email: Support group, please send me the official request form
Me, in my thoughts: "Why couldn't you have just attached the damn thing in your email?"
Support staff, via phone: "I don't understand why you sent me an email requesting the official request form."
Me, via phone: "Because you sent me an email telling me to. Is it available on the intranet?"
Support staff: "No, it's not on the intranet."
Me: "Could you send it to me?"
Support staff: "No, because there isn't one."
So they created one, just for me. Isn't that sweet.
But that's just work, and work is supposed to slip into absurdity at least once in a while.
Here's what else is going on.
The whole situation with my mom has gone from bad to worse. My brother and I were all set to fly down to CA; we both had our FLMA approved and we were just trying to figure out what the best time for me to fly in. Then he called me and said to cancel my flight because things suddenly got worse. She was doing all right, but last week she just broke and she's now in a secured psychiatric facility. He's so stressed out about it that I am afraid he's going to have a heart attack. Seriously. The other day his blood pressure was 160/125, way, way too high. He's a nurse at a hospital and the doctor on staff gave him some nitro tablets to keep on hand. And did I mention that the county is filing criminal charges against my uncle because of his actions in this whole sorry affair? That's just the headline news version. It's way more complicated than I'm describing it.
And, remember that super special talent I have for adopting the most wonderful animals that have just the most rotten diseases? I took Rose into the vet yesterday for an emergency appointment because she couldn't get up. The vet's first words to me were "it's so good of you that adopt dogs that have issues", which I know he meant as a compliment, as a testament to my generous nature blah blah blah. Of course I told him, "well, I don't know they have "issues" when I adopt them." Right now she is on a staggering amount of painkillers and I'm taking her in tomorrow for more xrays. There is definitely a problem with her back. There were some Xrays of her hips taken last February which do show the area that's causing her problems. Unfortunately, the vet doesn't have all the views he needs (since they weren't checking for spinal column issues before). The existing front/back views show an abnormality in her L6 and L7 area, right at the base of the spine. It could be pressure on her sciatic nerve (best case), which can be treated with meds. It could be a slipped disc, which can be treated with meds and/or surgery. But I'm going to wait until I see the side view Xrays, because those could show a sadly familiar spongy growth and starburst fracture in the spinal column and an enlarged lymph node. Yeah, I'm thinking the worst.
You know, there is more going on. But I just don't feel like writing any more right now.